Here's My Dilemma, Again and Again...

...swimsuit season!

(SURGEON GENERAL WARNING: DIATRIBE ALERT!!!!!)

Yearly, it's the same huge debacle.

Now, I'm not complaining about my size, and I don't get a yearly eating disorder in prep for it.  (Not saying I wouldn't LOVE to be smaller again though, either.)
But my issue solely stems from finding THE FIT and THE COVERAGE for the northern hemisphere of my frame.

One-piece, boy shorts, high-cut, low-cut, bandeau, bikini, tankini, rash guards, cutaways & monokini....wait, what?!  Cutaways, really?  What's left to cutaway?!  And monokini, What the bananas?!?!?!?!  (It's like the thong of one pieces!)  Seriously, its all enough to give a girl a migraine...Not only are there too many options, none of them seem to be made of much anymore.
Not. at. all.

Modesty's a HUGE deal to me.  Love Speedo & TYR, for their modesty.  However, it's like my own civil war.  My North & South don't agree, so a one piece is a ridiculous ordeal!  Plus, Neither Speedo or TYR have the support necessary to outfit me.  ::tear::

Last year I was infatuated with the line from Lime Ricki.  They have a lot of stuff that I LOVE (like the Bailey Top or the Nicki Top).  Though upon further browsing of their wares/wears, I'm not so sure they can give me what I NEED.  It's great to offer cute, but if they can't back that cute up for a wider variety of bodies, well then...cute doesn't cut it.  (Not knocking them, they just don't work for me.  By all means, give 'em a whirl if they'll work for you.)

Also, last year, I was totally digging this gem from Victoria's Secret.  However, note that not only was I having MAJOR issues with the mid-drift showing, but also with these words in the description "shelf bra."  What a joke!  "We loosely stitched a little elastic thread through there, so let's classify it as a 'shelf bra'.  That sounds good!  Since it says VS on it, it's bound to sell.  Yeah, yeah!  That'll do it."  Don't get me wrong here either, I'm a big Victoria's Secret fan.  (Can you keep a secret?  ...no pun intended, lol... I used to work there in college.  When it comes to support garments that come with wires, I LOVE that place.  But their hardware is a MUST!  Otherwise it's not worth it.  Hence my lack of appreciation for a shelf bra from there.  Just sayin'.)  Unless it says in there "this shelf bra will fit like the most secure Nike sports bra made of titanium" then I'm not buying it.  Not even a single mention of sports bra security, yeah...no kudos to them.

This year, I plan to give Hapari a try though.  I've heard great things about their suits.  Plus upon taking a stroll through their virtual shop, I'm impressed with the quality & attention to details, not to mention physics AND GRAVITY!

Forgive me, cause I'm gonna be frank (no, not "Hi Frank, nice to meet you" in a gruff, gravelly voice):
Ok, I'm busty. So I'm having a hard time deciding whether to go with the Sport Tankini style (which, btw, I adore it's length, but I don't want to run the risk of looking like a tube-o-mom over here...had that happen once...bought a racer back, sport/control suit in a lovely cobalt blue last year.....no joke, one look in the mirror & I screamed, no cried.  Well both, at the same time, actually.  I looked like a Smurf turd).

I also like the V-Neck Tankini style (but I don't want "the girls" to spontaneously pop/squish out;  not to mention my neck to ache from the tie;  nor my back-fat to OOZE out from between the straps, since there'll need to be some MAJOR tension going on).

The S.O.S. Tankini style sounds heavenly (I just KNOW the cutesy Butterfly style can't hack this)!  But as far as patterns are concerned, I'm in love with the Black Aloha pattern and the Metro pattern...not to mention, I'm over the moon for the Island Fever pattern.  Matter of fact, Island Fever & Black Aloha are probably my top two!
Also, I am simply ADORING the Tummy Tuk Bottoms & the Hot Shorts!

So that's my swimwear dilemma.  Have tried to work it all out with Land's End swimwear before, and it was tragedy.  They're great suits, built sturdy, just not designed to handle all this.  (For some reason, Destiny's Child's "Bootylicious" just started playing in my head right now. "I don't think you can handle this!" ...BAH!)

This year'll be a doozy as well, since now I've gotta 13 yr old who's apparently following my lead.  We both struggle with finding suits in local stores that cover everything, but don't make us look like petri dish experiments. (Not to mention don't cost an arm & a leg, and require we buy stock in a sailboat's sailcoth company in order to afford all the material required.)

So, perhaps I'm totally alone in my grumbling this year.  Then again, maybe I'm not.  No matter the body size, perhaps you're struggling to find modest as well.  Give those company's I mentioned a peek.  They may be perfect for you!

Also, as further incentive, my pal, Juliana, over at A Blonde Walks into a Blog is having a Hapari giveaway!  Check it all out and happy summer/swimwear shopping.

(P.S. Hapari also offers women's clothing helps, some junior's stuff.  Hooray for that idea!!!  Woot woot!)